Mean old people...

What makes old people think that they can be rude, mean, & generally unpleasant when they're in the grocery store??

I was raised to respect my elders. I'll hold doors, give them my seat, help with packages - generally whatever I can do that would be helpful and not insulting. I have the utmost respect for my elders. But man, some of them just do not deserve it.

There must have been 50 people over the age of 75 at the grocery store today. Only one of them was pleasant. The rest? Several blocked the aisles. One came to a complete & sudden stop right in front of me so that I almost plowed her over - then looked at me like I was at fault. (Maybe I was - is rear-ending someone with a cart like rear-ending them with a car?) One glared at me because I dared to stop & grab something off a shelf. Another came racing (yeah, I know - most move at a snail's pace, but this one was a regular Dale Earnhardt) around the corner & almost plowed into me. I stopped, and said, "I'm sorry. Excuse me." - even though it wasn't my fault - but she just gave me a hateful look & jerked her cart around to pass me. Then I had to wait 5 minutes in the cereal aisle because two old biddies older ladies were chatting right in front of the cereal I needed, and they couldn't hear me saying "excuse me".

Seriously? What is it about the grocery store that makes senior citizens act like Cujo? Are they hungry? Geesh - there's a Starbucks as you walk in - grab a frappuccino or something. Did they miss a nap? Go home & come back later! Are they in pain? Here's some ibuprofen & the keys to the motorized cart. Do they need help? Just ask!!

If my kids had ever behaved like these seniors, I would've given them one warning and then given them a time-out. And they wouldn't get to go to the store next time. I never allowed them to act like that in public.

Is this kind of behavior something I need to fear as I grow older? Will I one day wake up, go to the grocery store, and suddenly have the urge to block aisles, cut people off, and glare at anyone who makes eye contact with me? Okay, sometimes I do the glaring thing now, but will I start doing the other stuff? I can only hope that my kids will take me out of the store & give me a time out if I go over to the dark side.

AYU Vino Bronzing Mist 8%

AYU has been in the sunless tanning business for many years, but they have a couple of new products available this year. One of those is the Vino Bronzing Mist (available in 8%, 10%, & 12%), which is the product I'm reviewing today.

This product was made to be applied with an airbrush or HVLP machine - but those of you who are familiar with sunless.com are aware that there are ways to apply this type of product without any fancy equipment or a partner. For this test, I used a microfiber car pad for application and put the solution in a 2 oz. spray bottle.

From the label:
Look good and feel better with unique Vino Bronzing mist to create the just-off-the-beach look, and feel better by knowing that it is made with locally grown Muscadine grape skin extract, Muscadine grape juice, & Grape seed oil. Developed for luxurious sunless tanning that achieves the most natural-looking tan even on the most fair skin. Quick drying, no stickiness and no developing odor and, most of all, receive all the benefits from our Grape escape treatment with Muscadine grapes which are naturally rich in antioxidants, vitamins, & polyphenols.

Key ingredients:
Muscadine Grape Skin Extract
Muscadine Grape Juice
Grape Seed Oil
Hyaluronic Acid
Eco-certified DHA
Panthenol (B5)
Green Tea
Red Wine Powder
Vitamin E

SD-Alcohol free, paraben free, formaldehyde free, phthalate free, vegan

_____

How many sunless tanning products have I tried that claim to be quick drying, non-sticky, and fragrance-free/no developing odor? So, so many. How many of those actually live up to those claims? I can count them on one hand and have fingers left over. But for me, this one lives up to all of it's claims. It dries completely within just a couple of minutes - with no residual stickiness. Not even in the bends of your elbows or knees!! Not even in 90 degree weather with a lot of humidity. No fragrance and no developing odor (athough the developing odor is usually related to individual body chemistry, so your results may vary)!! And you know how sometimes your skin will have that tight feeling the day after tanning? Not with this product! My skin felt soooo soft & smooth. Love it!

Consistency & appearance: This product has a slightly thickened consistency. It reminds me of the consistency of heavy whipping cream. It has a very dark colorguide (CG) that is espresso/purple - very neutral. According to Vibha at AYU, there is actually very little FD&C dye in the product - the dark tint comes from the dark color of the grape extract. It's very easy to apply - and dries extremely quickly, especially when you consider that this is a thicker product.

About my skin type & tanning: I am a Type I/II (I almost always burn, but I can get a very slight tan with a lot of patience.) I'm Casper-the-Friendly-Ghost white, with dark blonde hair and blue/green/gray eyes. My skin is pretty sensitive, so I have to be careful with certain ingredients - especially fragrance. When sunless tanning, my skin is atypical of a Type I/II in that I need at least 7.5-8% DHA to get decent color. Anything less than that usually gives me translucent color that tends to look orangish. I don't do well with drugstore products, and I prefer airbrush tanning solutions (ABS) to any other type of sunless tanner. Products with a dark CG can cause fading issues for me, so I usually counteract that by showering after 4-6 hours. This allows me to absorb the DHA without any staining from the CG.

(This is an old picture of my natural skin color vs. one coat of SUN UD. Yes, there is a bit of glare in the photo, but I assure you, my natural color really is that white-blue.)

Skin prep: I showered using Ulta's 3-in-1 Shower Smoothie (in Cocolada) and lightweight nylon exfoliating gloves (there are different types - these are very lightweight & minimally abrasive). After showering, I used Ulta's Shower Smoothie Hand & Body Cream (in Cocolada - and this is more like a thick lotion than a cream - it absorbs completely without any greasiness) to prep the areas that I know tend to "grab" the color - elbows, knees, ankles.

Application: After the lotion was absorbed, I began applying the AYU solution to one area at a time. I dampened the microfiber pad with a bit of water, then sprayed the solution onto the pad. I started with my left lower leg - skimming the pad over the surface of the skin - being careful not to apply too much pressure. I covered all areas evenly, but did not rub or blend too much. I continued with my left upper leg, then my right leg, arms, stomach, & chest. Gus helped me with my back. By the time I was finished with this, my legs were dry, so I started all over again, applying a second coat. For my feet, I put a pea-sized dollop of the Ulta lotion in my palm, added 5-6 sprays of the tanning solution - rubbed my hands together carefully to mix - applied to my left foot & repeated for the right foot. I carefully scrubbed my palms with soap & water to remove any traces of the tanner.

Next, I wiped my elbows, knees, & ankles with a damp washcloth to remove some of the tanning solution (since I know these areas tend to develop darker than the rest of my body). For my hands, I put a pea-sized dollop of the Ulta lotion in my palm, added 6-7 sprays of the tanning solution, and rubbed my hands together carefully to mix - then applied as if I was putting lotion all over my hands. When finished, I wiped my palms, nails & cuticles with a damp washcloth.

After an hour or two, I applied more lotion to my elbows, knees, ankles, feet, & hands - then wiped my palms with a dry paper towel.

After 4-6 hours, I showered off all of the tanning solution, then applied Ulta lotion all over.

My final color (after 24 hours) was nice, but I was able to see some staining from the dark CG. After a couple of days, I looked like I had lizard skin - but I didn't. This is what happens to me when I use a product with a dark CG. Because I have mature skin, it's not completely smooth. The CG tends to get down into those little "crevices" in the skin (that are not otherwise noticeable) - then when the surface skin starts to fade, the color stays dark in those "crevices", and it makes it look "scaly". This is not an issue related to just this product, but to every product with a dark CG used on my skin.

 

(Please note the differences in the color. This is what the differences in lighting, cameras, & monitors produce. So you may not even be perceiving the color as it actually looked in real life. In reality, the color wasn't quite as dark as the first pictures, nor was it as light as the last picture. Keep this in mind when viewing tans online or in photos.)

I was determined to find a way to make this product work for me - because I like the color a lot and love the way it makes my skin feel. So I decided to try tweaking the application routine. (This is important!!! If a product doesn't work for you, it's not necessarily the product's fault - you may just need to tweak your application method!) This time, I prepped & applied the same way as before, but after 2 hours, I applied the Ulta lotion all over - essentially "diluting" the CG on my skin, without removing the product. (Note: if you do this, you will need to carefully scrub your palms to avoid staining. They will look purple/brown!)  I also used Kardashian Glamour Tan on my hands & feet instead of the VBM. (I'll do a review on that soon.) Then after 4 hours, I showered everything off and applied more lotion.

After 18 hours, the color was really nice - a little lighter than usual, but really nice. And there was no visible staining from the colorguide. Even a couple of days later, it looked good. I lightly exfoliated & reapplied on Day 3 - with the same great results.

 
Notes:

• I purchased this product myself & was not asked to do a review by AYU.
• I received no compensation for reviewing this product.
• This product was an 8% solution, and I usually use a 10% solution - so I expected my color to be a bit lighter than usual. I do have some 10% here that I will be trying soon.
• I also intend to try this product using the MaxiMist HVLP to apply. When I do, I will add an update & pictures.
  

Product info:
4 oz. (available in 8%, 10%, 12%) - $6.50

8 oz.
8% - $20.92
10% - $21.86
12% -$24.00

Other sizes also available: 32 oz., 1/2 gallon, 1 gallon

Repurchase? Yes!

A day in the life...

Ever have one of those days when you know before you even get out of bed that it's not going to be good? Let me tell you a little story...

The other day, I woke up later than usual. So already, I'm behind. Great. As soon as I open my eyes, I realize that my head hurts. Now I'm behind and I have a headache. It's gonna be a great day...

I'm in the bathroom, doing the normal morning routine - washing my face, brushing my teeth, fixing my hair. Then I try to look at the back of my hair in the mirror when I realize I'm holding the hairbrush and not a mirror. Please note: this does not work.

Moving on to makeup...everything is going pretty well now. Maybe everything will be okay. Sigh of relief. Oh, no. Wait. Blinked while the mascara wand was against my upper lashes. Now my eye is watering & I have a ton of mascara under my eye. Pretty. Maybe I should leave it there - it speaks to my state of mind.

 

I manage to fix things (I think - it's hard to know for sure when you can't open your eye all the way) - and it's back to the bathroom to pop in the contacts & give the hair one more spritz of hairspray. %#@*!!!! Apparently my eyes are open enough to take a direct stream of hairspray. Well, that really sucked.

I'm afraid to venture out of the house, but I really need to go to Walgreens. I'm starting to sweat. It's just up the street - less than a mile - and I only need a couple of things. It should be okay. Man up!! Be brave!!

Got the car out of the garage & down the driveway without mishap. That's a good sign! Hey! I made it to the end of the street - I can see Walgreens - I'm almost there. I start to smile.

There's a dark green Saturn Sky that made it to the 4-way stop ahead of me. Who is that driving? OMG BECKY. It's a little old lady. Like ancient old. Older than, well, the oldest thing you can think of...WTF is she doing in a sportscar? She can barely see over the steering wheel. She's pulling out into the intersection...wait...wait...wait...she's still in the intersection...wait...wait...wait...she's going into the right turning lane. Wait. Wait. Wait...no, she's going into the left turning lane...wait...wait...wait...oh, she's just going to straddle the lanes.

OMG BECKY AGAIN. She's going straight - just like me. Whew! She's getting into the other lane. Wait. Wait. Wait...no, she's getting back in front of me. Wait. Wait. Wait. She's inching back over into the other lane. No, no - she's going to turn into Walgreens from the wrong lane. 'Kay.

There are at least 10 open spaces that I can see...she's turning left into the parking lot. Wait. Wait. Wait. She's stopped. In the middle of the parking lot. Can't get around her - can't back up. She's just sitting there. Wait - she's moving now. There are two open spots together - I think she's going to park there. She's inching forward. Inching. Inching. Stopped. IN. THE. MIDDLE. OF. THE. PARKING. LOT. AGAIN. Waiting...

Oh, she's moving again. Inching forward. Inching forward. She's halfway in the spot. Well, she's between the two spaces, but I don't care how she parks, I just want her to get the hell out of my way. MOVE THE CAR!! I may have made a rude hand gesture at this point.

I drive around to the other side of the parking lot, park my car, walk about 50 feet to the door - and she is just getting out of her car. **takes a deep breath and prays that she doesn't get in front of me in the checkout line** (BTW - she's about 4 feet tall and is wearing a wig in one of those incredibly unnatural colors.)

Oh, please! They're out of Snickers and Twix bars? WTF?? How can they be out of Snickers and Twix bars? I need these for an Easter basket. I don't want to go to another store! The little voice in the back of my head is laughing it's ass off and I am not amused. I wonder if a shot of tequila would shut that little f-er up?

Great! There's only one person in line ahead of me. Now I can just get out of here and go home where it's relatively safe. OMG. She's just standing there chatting with the cashier. Chatting, chatting, chatting. Um, hello? Another person in line here! OMG. SHE'S WRITING A CHECK. Who writes a check these days? Does she have any of it filled out in advance? NO. Writing. Writing. Talking. Writing. Laughing. Talking. Writing. Is there steam coming out of my ears yet? PEOPLE!!!! If you must write a check, please fill out as much as possible before getting in line!!

Finally. She's picking up her bag. Oh, no. Wait. She forgot something. OMG. The cashier is getting it for her!! Please tell me this isn't happening. There are five people in line & this is the only cashier. Oh, please, please!! DO NOT WRITE ANOTHER CHECK. No, no, it's worse. She's scrounging in her bottomless handbag for change to pay for it. Oh, there's a quarter! Dig, dig, dig. Here's another quarter! I can't even pretend to not be aggravated at this point. Brilliant cashier decides to call for another cashier. Why bother now?

Shut up, voice - I hear you laughing your ass off. You are so getting a shot of tequila when I get home.

Things will be better tomorrow. They can't get worse. Can they? They can't, right?

Dear "lady" in the black Windstar,

You were in front of me today while I was driving to the dentist's office. I followed you for about five miles, and I made some observations.

 

I see you have a decal on the back of your minivan that says "FOXY". Hmmmm.  I'm pretty sure it's not foxy to hang your arm out of the window while you drive in 40 degree weather. And I know it's not foxy to flick the ashes from your cigarette out that same window. Which leads me to conclude that it's also not foxy to toss your burning cigarette butt out of that same window. And since we're on the subject, it's not foxy to drive a black Windstar either.
 
I don't think you're fooling anyone with the "foxy" sign. 'Kay? Thanks.

Sincerely,
The lady in the black SUV with cigarette ashes on it

P.S. Yes, I did just break a tooth and I'm getting a migraine - but I'm pretty sure that my judgment on this particular issue isn't clouded by pain.

Wednesday's WTF??

Ladies, stop! Look no further for candy to put in your significant other's Easter basket! I've found the perfect WTF gift(s)!! The only drawback is that YOU will have to wear them...

This bra is available from amazon.com for just $7.99 (plus $5.49 shipping) - and I'm thinking that this is best worn by those who are an A cup or smaller:

For those who are a little more daring, there are candy nipple tassels - and these should work for the more well-endowed gals, too. They're only $4.65! Unfortunately, shipping is $4.50 - and they're not eligible for Amazon's free shipping.

And don't worry, you can get a matching g-string, too (and I hope the "thong" part isn't covered in candy as well!):

Hmmm, maybe these would be more appropriate for Valentine's Day. But I'm guessing that he won't mind when you give them... after all, it's the thought that counts, right?

Confession

...is good for the soul - or so they say. I admit it - I have a problem with stupid people. And by problem, I mean that I have no use for them at all. Except for an occasional laugh when they have an epic fail. Which is pretty often.

For instance - if you're going to the bank to make a deposit or withdrawal, and you're planning to use the drive-thru, and you know that other people use the drive-thru, and the whole point of a drive-thru is to make a quick transaction - then why in the world would you not fill out your deposit/withdrawal slip and sign the checks before you leave the house???? It doesn't seem to matter that the bank puts up signs telling you to have everything ready - because you think that means everyone but you.

And here's another little tidbit for stupid people - pharmacies have telephone numbers that you can call to ask as many questions as you want about your insurance, your prescription, your doctor, how many things you have wrong with you, what's on sale this week, and whatever else it is that you people talk about when it's your turn at the counter. That way the rest of us can avoid a wait in a line that rivals the the margarita line at a Jimmy Buffett concert. All I wanted was sinus pills with pseudoephedrine - but of course, I can't buy them off the shelf any longer because other stupid people had to abuse the ingredients - so here I stand, in a line behind you, trying not listen (because there is a big sign telling me to stand back to allow you privacy - and I, unlike some people, actually read the signs & think they apply to me), but you're talking so loudly that Bill over in produce heard you. Now my popsicles have melted and I'm going to need a refill on my migraine meds.

Sometimes I dream of a world where SPF doesn't stand for 'sun protection factor', but for 'stupidity protection factor'. Imagine how much money you could make if you owned the patent on a product that kept stupid people away! Sort of like insect repellent but less smelly. I'd invest in a case of 50 SPF and never leave home without it. Stupid people would feel a vague sense of unease as they neared anyone wearing SPF, so without knowing why, they'd always stay back 50 feet. How awesome would that be?? (pausing a moment to close my eyes and to imagine Utopia...)

And you can't even tell them to get a clue. Because if they could get a clue, they wouldn't be stupid people. It's a conundrum. A vicious circle. A catch-22. An impasse. It's a pain in the ass.

Life is good.

It's Friday - the sun is shining, my new shoes arrived (and they fit!), I'm drinking sweetened black iced tea from Starbucks, and listening to Bob Marley. The only thing that could make it better is if I was doing all of this while lying in a hammock on a white sandy beach, looking out over the clear blue water. In the immortal words of Bob - is this love, is this love, is this love... that I'm feeling?? I'm just going to pretend all of this snow is white sand.

Speaking of good things - did you watch Shaun White at the Olympics this week? How cute is he? And talented, too. He makes extreme snowboarding look incredibly easy. And fun. When I said it looked like fun and I'd like to try it - my son laughed and told me I'd break a hip. Yeah, that's right. He said I'd break a HIP. Good thing it involves being out in the cold, which I hate - or I'd have to just show my son who'd be breaking a hip. (And yes, I realized it probably would be me - but that's beside the point.) I had to laugh at the men's halfpipe medal ceremony - Shaun was pretty subdued during the national anthem - until the last few bars, when he just couldn't hold it back any longer & played the air guitar. Loved it! And how cute is Johnny Weir? Who else would wear a flower crown on their head & wave to the crowd like a princess wearing a tiara? Loved it!! And Evan Lysacek was so darned cute when he realized he had won the gold medal. The cutest dimples ever! And his skating wasn't bad either, LOL! Anyway - congratulations to all US medal winners! Congratulations, Team USA!

Another happy event - we thought our state tax refund was only going to be around $20. Apparently there was an error concerning tuition credit, and we actually received a little over $300. Yay us! Nothing like a little unexpected money to brighten your day! I have no doubt that I will be able to find a wonderful way to spend that little windfall. Right, honey? I know you're reading this...

And my daughter got a 96 on her speech! That was pretty exciting because she is terrified of speaking in public. So yay for her overcoming her fear to pull off an A!! Woot!!

It's been a good week. **gives thanks**

I'll leave you with a few more of Bob's words - this is my message to you (ooh ooh); don't worry about a thing...'cause every little thing is gonna be alright...

Have a wonderful weekend!!

Say it ain't snow!!!

I hate snow. I hate being cold. But no one hates snow more than my husband. At the mere mention of snow, he starts pacing and grumbling. He thinks life should come to a grinding halt when there's snow. And God forbid that our daughter should have class or our son should be scheduled to work. So this latest snow (I think we have about 12") really got him worked into a frenzy. Our son still had to go to work today, but thank goodness our daughter's college canceled all classes. That saved her from the ultimate embarrassment, because her dad was planning to drive her to class, wait for her in the Student Union, and then drive her home. Nothing like having your dad hang out in the Student Union.

Of course, my husband is working from home today - as he does on all days when there is snow. Actually, he tends to work from home even if there is just a chance of snow. We laugh at him, but I'm glad I don't have to worry about him out on the road with the crazies who don't know how to drive in the snow. Besides, who am I to mock him? I'm sitting here at my desk, typing on my pink laptop with my pink Snuggie wrapped around my legs. I may get up to make a hot drink - later. Or not. I'll play it by ear.

 

The view from my front porch

The view from my deck

For some reason, our dog (a miniature Australian shepherd named Riley) has decided that he loves the snow. Which is weird because we used to have to force him to go outside when there was more than 2 inches of snow. We always had to shovel spots for him to do his business because he didn't like squatting in the snow. Can't say that I blame him. But today he thinks the snow is grand. He spent more than an hour outside, just sitting in the snow. I asked him several times if he wanted to come inside, but he just looked at me like I was cramping his style. So outside he stayed. When he finally came inside, he had snowballs all over his fur. They were like little white dingleberries, LOL.

Riley's snowballs

He's quite distressed

When he discovered the snowballs, he ran around the house frantically, as if to say "Get them off me - NOW!!!". I tried to help, but they were impossible to remove - both because they were stuck like glue to his fur & because he wouldn't stop running around like the Tasmanian devil. He kept trying to bite at the snowballs - pulling on them to get them out of his fur. But that was all to no avail - those suckers weren't budging until they melted. He was fairly traumatized - or so I thought. Less than a half hour later, he wanted back outside. And we repeated the process two more times before he finally gave up and took a nap. The cats think he's insane, but since he provides comedic entertainment for them, they allow him to live in their house. 

At least one of us doesn't mind the snow. The rest of us are counting the days until spring. There are 38. Just in case you wondered.

Respect your elders!?

I was raised to respect my elders. And I do. I offer elderly people my seat and I hold the door for them. I even like some of them, LOL. They have so much life experience. They have wonderful stories to tell (even if they do tell them over and over and over). They can offer sage advice on just about anything. I admire that. I hope to be like them someday.

But I would rather visit the gynecologist for an exam than be in the same grocery store as an old person. I would rather iron a mountain of clothes than follow an old person down a grocery aisle - and those of you who know me, know how much I detest ironing. And I would rather go without Starbucks sweetened black iced tea than be behind an old person in the grocery checkout lane.

Why do they think it's okay for them to drive their carts down the center of each aisle, making it impossible for anyone to pass them? There's Marge, walking soooooo slowly. I get it - she's old, she moves slowly - and that's okay. But could she just pick a side? Noooo - she shuffles her way down the center of the aisle, causing a major traffic flow problem. She's totally oblivious to everyone else in the store. Maybe it's a vision & hearing thing. Maybe she has no idea that of the ruckus she's causing...and who is going to tell her? Not me. Because I respect my elders.

When they need to look at items on the shelf, why do they park their cart right smack dab in the center of the aisle? There's Herb - and you can't get around him. He can't hear you saying "Excuse me" over and over again. And don't even think about moving his cart on your own. That just pisses him off and now he thinks you're a punk trying to steal his groceries. It doesn't matter that you're 48 years old and have a cart full of your own groceries - you're a punk & he's Clint Eastwood asking you if you feel lucky. Well, do ya, punk?

Apparently the elderly lose sphincter control along with their sense of smell. You know what I'm talking about - don't pretend otherwise. But since they didn't hear it, feel it, or smell it - it didn't happen. Never mind that you've been following Fred throughout the store & he rips one with every step he takes - he's right, you're wrong, punk. You just try to get into the next aisle and pray that no one thinks you're the one who left the vapor trail.

And they always pay for their groceries with cash. I have no problem with that. But they insist upon paying for it with exact change - and Ethel knows that she has a nickle and two pennies somewhere in her purse. Just hold on a minute while she takes everything out so she can find the change in the bottom. No, no - she doesn't want to use that dime - she has the exact change. Just hold your horses, sonny! And after she pays the cashier, she will stand there in that same spot until she puts everything back into her bottomless purse. "Oh, look! There's the TV remote! I wondered where I put that!" Then she launches into a story about how she was watching JAG reruns - isn't that Harm just the cutest thing? - then she went into the kitchen during a commercial and that was the last she saw of the remote. Until now. You've been such a help. She's glad she came to the store today. Meanwhile, all of my frozen foods are dripping onto the floor & I've developed a tic in my right eye.

But I'm smiling. Because I was taught to respect my elders. And someday I'll be elderly, God willing. But you won't see me in the grocery store, because my kids have already informed me that I won't be allowed to go there. They also say I won't be allowed to drive. Ppfffsssttt. That's what they think. Punks. Now where did I put that remote??

Cats are funny

A few years ago, my son was visiting my mom over the summer. There were several kittens at her house, all of which were adorable. When my son was packing to come home, he found one of the kittens curled up in his suitcase. Needless to say, a couple of months later, that kitten came to live with us. We named him Angus (after Angus Young of AC/DC, of course), but as all of our pets end up with nicknames, Angus became 'Ang-goose', 'Ang-goose' became 'Goosey' - and that's pretty much all he is called these days.

He's quite a handsome cat. We suspect his father was a Maine Coon; his mother was a gorgeous black domestic long-hair, with bright green eyes.

Goosey loves to play with little furry toy mice. He bats them all over the place & then carries them around in his mouth like it's real prey. He also likes to play fetch. Yes, I said he likes to play fetch. You throw the mouse and he will race after it, carry it back to you, then drop it so you can throw it again. It's hilarious! He's also fascinated with water - if you run a thin stream of water from the faucet, he'll get in the sink and bat at the water. He also, for whatever reason, likes the dog. Personally, I think he just likes to torment Riley. He will walk up and rub all over the Riley - while Riley holds perfectly still with a horrified look on his face. As you can see in the picture above, he always has one paw at the 'ready'. I like to call it his 'thwacking paw'. It's kinda like a pimp hand. If he doesn't like something you do, he won't hesitate to thwack you with the paw. Sometimes, it's even accompanied by a growl. He thinks he's a ferocious tiger. And like most cats, aloofness is an art that he has perfected.

As anyone who knows cats is aware - you don't pick your cat, your cat picks you. Goosey likes all of us, but I think I'm his favorite human. I'm the person he brings the mouse to when he wants to play fetch. I'm the person he comes to when it's time to be fed. When my husband was out of town recently, Goosey decided that he was the man of the house and that it was his responsibility to sleep in my room. He doesn't usally sleep in there, and if he does, it's only for 5-6 hours. But for these nights, he stayed in there for a good 8-10 hours. One night when I was up later than usual, he felt it was his responsibility to tell me that it was bedtime. He chirped, meowed, and was generally very vocal about letting me know he wanted me to go to bed. Bossy cat.

Today, I was sitting in my desk chair - there was a pillow behind me, and my Snuggie was scrunched up in the chair, too. Here came Goosey, purring like a freight train - kneading the pillow & getting all comfy. When I moved, he was quite disgruntled - which explains the look on his face:

 

Then when I started taking pictures, he perked up a little. Notice the thwacking paw is at the ready, as usual.

 

I went out to run some errands, and when I returned, I put my coat on the table since I had to leave again soon. After a few minutes, I walked back into the kitchen, and this is what I found:

 

I went back to the desk to check my email, and after a few minutes, here came Goosey. He got back on the pillow behind me - purring like a freight train. I reached back to pet him and he started licking my hand - which is quite a compliment, because he rarely lowers himself to groom a human. I was feeling quite fond of him and shared the day's events with my son when I picked him up from work.

When we got home, Goosey was all lovey still. Of course, it was time for his dinner - and he knows who opens the cans of food. Regardless, I was feeling quite honored by all of his attention. Then my son came upstairs and said, "I know why Goosey was so lovey today" - and proceeded to tell me that there was kitty barf on the carpet in the basement. Apparently, he just wanted me in a good mood when I found his mess. Damned cat. Sigh. He has me wrapped around his furry little paw. I lurves him.

Public cellphone usage tips

People, people, people - if you're going to use your cellphone in public, think about where you are, what you're saying and how loudly you're saying it.

I admit, there are times when I talk too loudly on my phone. But if I can't hear, then the person on the other end can't hear either, right? LOL! I'm trying to work on talking normally all the time and my kids are happy to shush me as needed. But the extent of my conversation is usually "Hi", "Can I call you back", or "Why didn't you tell me you needed that before I left home?".

So many times I've been in the grocery store, shopping & minding my own business, when suddenly I heard a voice so loud that my first thought was, "It's the emergency broadcast system! I must seek immediate shelter"! But wait - no, that's not it - the emergency broadcast system doesn't use 4-letter words - it's someone on a cellphone IN THE NEXT AISLE! Can you repeat that? I think someone over in aisle 10 missed it.

And let's talk about the doctor's office. If you're in the waiting room & decide to use your phone - for the love HIPAA, take it outside! Everyone in the waiting room is shifting uncomfortably in their seats, trying not to make eye contact with you as you proceed to talk about why you're there. No one wants to hear about your rash or your husband's erectile dysfunction.

I do not need to know your business. I do not need to hear your extensive vocabulary of profanities. I do not need to know anything about your baby daddy/mama. I'm terribly embarrassed for you, especially since you're obviously too clueless to be embarrassed for yourself. Get an unlimited texting plan - and use it. And don't forget to put your phone on vibrate.

Annoying drivers...

As I was driving to the post office today, I was reminded of just how many annoying drivers there are out there. I live in an area that is very close to the city, but it's also very close to a rural area. It's a straight, 4-lane stretch of road between my house & the post office, passing mostly through rolling farmland. There is usually a fair amount of traffic on this road considering that there are no retail stores or gas stations. The speed limit is 55 mph - yet you rarely find anyone going that speed. What happened today is not an unusual occurrence - there was a car in each of the southbound lanes, and neither one of them was going over 45 mph. They drove side-by-side - and neither one seemed to be aware of the traffic piling up behind them. And no, neither one was an international harvester, so there was no excuse. What, may I ask, is the reason for having two southbound lanes if they're both going to be used by slow drivers?? I have no problem with them driving 45 mph - but don't use both lanes. Argh.

So that made me start thinking of all the other annoying things that drivers do - and I made a list. Amazingly enough, typing out the list made me feel better, LOL!

I hate...

• drivers that pull out in front of me at the last minute, then drive so slowly that I have to slam on my brakes. For the love of burnt rubber! You couldn't have waited 5 more seconds for me to pass by? You had to pull out RIGHT NOW, so you could GO SLOW?
• drivers that slam on their brakes for no apparent reason. Why in the world would you suddenly slam on your brakes while driving 40-50 mph? Did you think you saw a red light? A deer? Were your kids driving you crazy & you threatened to stop the car 'right now' if they didn't stop fighting? 
• drivers who don't maintain a steady speed on a straight road with no traffic lights or stop signs. They drive along at 65 mph, then they slow down to 50 mph - then just as I start to pass them, they speed up to 65 mph. So I stay put, only to find them going 50 mph a minute later. WTF? Two words. Cruise control.
  
• drivers who 'merge' onto the freeway at 35 mph. Um, hello? The cars that you're merging with are going at least 55 mph - how do you think you're going to merge at 35 mph? I bet you can't follow someone into a revolving door either, can you?
• drivers who see a red light/stop sign a half mile up the road & think they should start slowing down way back here. My husband does this & it drives (ha!) me insane. **beats head on dashboard**
• drivers who creep along in parking lots. Yes, it's a parking lot - no, you shouldn't speed - but I CAN WALK FASTER THAN YOU'RE DRIVING!! And I have really short legs, too. Good grief, if there's not a spot, move along - the cars aren't going to magically disappear if you drive slowly enough.
• drivers who can't park their car between the white lines. If you park so close to me that I can't open my car door far enough to get in/out, I'm not going to be very happy. If you've left your young children in the car alone (and don't even get me started on that), they're probably going to hear some really colorful language. And if YOU hit MY car with YOUR car door - well, let's just say it's not going to be pretty.
  
• drivers who talk on their cellphones while driving. For Pete's sake, if you must talk, PLEASE GET A HEADSET. They swerve into the other lane, drive too slow, drive too fast - heck, the other day I passed a cop who was talking on his cellphone while driving.

I really do try to think of all the possible reasons a person could cut me off, or drive like a bat out of hell, or even drive on the side of the road - but I just can't think of ANY good reasons why people would do any of the above, LOL!


Do you have pet peeves about other drivers?